greasy taint

I realize that everything is turning into a billboard now, but usually it’s by choice. I remember how shocked I was when I saw boxers advertising brands on their shorts. Then ring girls had ads all over them, including fake tattoos. Then the back of every bus stop bench had an ad on it.

Then we saw taxi’s covered in ads. Including on their wheel covers.

But now, the Nfl is forcing media photographers to wear vests with advertisements on the back. In my opinion this isn’t right. First of all, the media companies probably already have to pay to be there. And now the Nfl is making money off them. But more importantly, we expect (yeah I know it’s idealistic) our media to be unbiased and impartial. But if they are donning advertisements, it makes them look a little less unbiased and impartial. And I know in this case, it shouldn’t and probably won’t affect what they report on, but this is setting a precedent. And that could lead to situations where we would mind it when our media is obviously and openly biased.

Thats it. Now go back to your lives.

Source : Chicago Tribune

fuck you for removing a ton of the funny comedy central clips from youtube
fuck you for not being reasonable
fuck you for being greedy
fuck you for not realizing this has hurt your image in the eyes of a lot of people
fuck you for continuing the “big media” stereotypes along
fuck you for now making me wonder how I’m going to update my blog with all the broken youtube videos on it
fuck you for giving me diarrhea
fuck you for making my asshole bleed
fuck you for the dry weather that’s causing me to have lots of boogers

I’m not sure if they had any control over the last 3, but I bet even if they did, they wouldn’t have done the right thing. So I say to you viacom and youtube

Fuck you Jobu, I do it myself!

SUFI MOTHER FUCKER!

If you don’t know what I’m rambling about, read here.

If you have watched tv lately you have probably seen that new M&M commercial where people turn into an M&M. If not, look at the bottom of the post for the video.

So anyways, there’s a site http://www.becomeanmm.com/ where you can choose from lots of different looks, facial features, hair, clothing, accesories and make you own M&M character. In fact you can make as many as you freakin want.

Mine is based on me, in an ideal world. In this ideal world all the woman want a piece of me. And I guarantee to melt in their mouths, their hands, and on the back of their knees. Oh yeah!

Name : Duke Sugar Britches Con Carne

Here is the commercial :

What Super Hero am I?

Your results:
You are Green Lantern

Green Lantern 70% Hulk 70% Spider-Man 65% Superman 65% Iron Man 60% Robin 55% The Flash 55% Supergirl 53% Catwoman 45% Batman 35% Wonder Woman 23%

Hot-headed. You have strong will power and a good imagination.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What Super Villain am I?

Your results:
You are Dr. Doom

Dr. Doom 87% Apocalypse 87% Magneto 85% The Joker 84% Juggernaut 83% Lex Luthor 80% Green Goblin 79% Venom 72% Riddler 70% Kingpin 66% Dark Phoenix 63% Poison Ivy 61% Mr. Freeze 58% Catwoman 57% Mystique 55% Two-Face 47%

Blessed with smarts and power but burdened by vanity.

you’re the only man whose ever been inside of mee

looks like a blast as long as it’s not with my car

Freakin awesome. I might just have to do that next time I quit a place I don’t give a shit about. And great music selection too.

This morning while driving to work I was eating a banana I had purchased a couple of days ago (The purchasing of the banana is not relevant to this story, but I just wanted to point out that I’m not a dirty filthy theif). It was quite yummy and I didn’t even find any large brown spots. Good banana. So anyways, about 10 minutes later I was waiting at a red light. And I decided to use the free moment to sin and admire my glorious face for a moment in the mirror. And I notice a piece of banana on my cheek. It was quite high on my cheek too. No where close to my mouth.

How the fuck does that happen? I know I’m not the only one this happens to. Cause I’ve seen it on other people’s faces. There’s one particular person I remember from my college days who used to routinely have food stuck at random places on his face. Rice next to the eye brow. Or some sauce by his nose.

I guess even if we never understand how that happens, it’s good for a few laughs. Next time you see me with food stuck on my face, make sure you point and laugh for several minutes before telling me about it. Or do what my brother would do. Put a piece of food on your face and talk to me till I realize that you are trying to send me a message.

No I’m not talking about left overs for dinner tonight. I found out today that if you search for “horse feces again” on google, my blog is the number one result. WooHoo!

How fucking cool is that? Sure I wish searching for something cooler than “horse feces again” reminded people of me. But you gotta start somewhere right?